Going nuts!

The squirrels are looking for me, they think I'm nuts!

Allergies are irritating. One of the worst aspects of having a child with food allergies is realising that the shiny immortality bubble that most kids carry around like a second skin isn’t present in the allergic child. They learn to worry about anaphylaxis and death, they have to carry around anti-histamines and ephedrine injectors, they learn to ask, and as soon as they can read, they read ingredient labels.

As a parent, you can hover and bite your nails, if that makes you happy. But it is more than likely going to send you to the nut-house.  Demanding a nut/wheat/dairy/egg/soy free environment is a road to insanity as well. In America, the K-3 school my children attended  had a partially nut-free policy. All common areas like the art class, media centre and library were totally nut-free zones. The rest of the school was okay except for the classrooms of the children with allergies. In those rooms, the kids who had peanut/nut products in their lunches could not open their lunch boxes in the classroom. All children ate at tables set out in the gym and the allergic kids had a special table apart from the rest of the school.

I know this smacks of segregation, but this issue is fraught with all kinds of emotional reactions, usually from parents: the parents who want their kids to be able to eat peanut butter vs. the parents who are terrified their child will die from the allergy. It has all the makings of an ugly scene or two.

In my opinion, the only solution is education and hard work. The separate table and nut-free zones may seem like hard work, but once the work is done, they are constant reminders to the teachers and students that there are seemingly innocuous things in this world that can be deadly to other people. It is kinetic education on a daily basis. Educate the allergic child to read labels, ask questions and if in doubt – Don’t. Educate the teachers on allergies and when to administer ephedrine. Educate the classmates about allergies and how to avoid killing their friends. Educate yourself so that you plan ahead and actually prepare food from scratch with ingredients you trust.

Part of the hard work for me is getting a nut-free policy of sorts started at the school my children attend in South Africa. Cases of severe nut allergies are increasing in South Africa, of course not in the numbers seen elsewhere, as our population is smaller and in most cases, quite poor, and as reported in the Sunday Times on October 25th this year, allergies seem to be more prevalent in the affluent.

The school advertised as a nut-free school, but they are dancing to a different tune now. There has been a change in tuck-shop management and the people who now run it are clearly woefully ignorant of food allergy issues. They stocked all kinds of peanut laden chocolate bars and when asked to cater for a school function in winter, very cleverly garnished a cauldron full of butternut soup with nuts! Bearing in mind this was a mass catering event, how long do your think the “pretty” addition on the top lasted? Of course it was the soup that my child preferred and of course the server had no idea what the ingredients were. It is only the chance passing of one of the geniuses behind the garnish idea who heard my nut questions that saved us from some very unpleasant consequences.

The furious email that was delivered to all senior management in boxes, probably did more harm than good. I wouldn’t really know, as most of them did not bother to reply and when they did it was with an answer that a politician would be proud of!

I have now made myself super popular by sending yet another round of emails after some nut tartlets were served at yet another school event. Caterers are denying all knowledge of the items, but unless I was hallucinating, they existed and emerged from the catering hatch, so someone is being economical with the truth.

Eventually in an attempt to get some sort of workable policy in place, I made an appointment with the headmaster of the Preparatory School and presented him with a written out plan that could potentially work and not step on the toes of the kids who like peanut butter. I offered my services as an allergy coordinator/implementor of plan and presenter of allergy information to all parents.

As a peace-offering, I created the mug pictured above. I had thought it out and sketched the squirrels after the first nutty email, and did the final finishing in Photoshop before the meeting. My reasoning being that you get further with a smile than you do with a frown.  Wish I had thought of this before I sent those emails. I wish I had known about Nick Morgan’s blog posts on body language so I could have gauged whether the principal was open or closed to my ideas.

The mug is now sitting on the secretary’s desk (note to Headmaster – my spies are everywhere!) which may or may not be a sign that they are receptive to change. There was a lot of humming, haa-ing, ifs, ands, and buts thrown around at the meeting. I hope they are prepared to do some work on this, if not they are going to be driven nuts by me and the squirrels might find them.

Being thankful

When I created this t-shirt/coffee mug slogan, it was based on an email that went around listing the promises girlfriends should make to each other. A nice departure from cute teddies and hearts and sloppy messages doing the email rounds. I have girlfriends who would at least give me a virtual slap for not taking care of myself and I think they are the best kind of friends to have. They stand by you in the tough times, but when you are whining or being stupid, they tell you so with no punches pulled. Of course, you get to return the compliment when they whine!

It reminded me that Thanksgiving is coming up in the States next week. When I first moved to America, Thanksgiving was just a couple of days off school and work. We were somewhat isolated as it is a holiday that involves families and togetherness and as a family of foreigners we watched with some confusion the turkey feasts that went on around us. Later, as we were adopted by various families, I came to appreciate just how nice this holiday is.

Okay it’s a bit hinky because it is only a month away from Christmas and there you are eating turkey. Most Americans thought we were a bit weird to eat turkey at Christmas, but there we were facing two massive bird eating rituals within a month. But it’s not the bird that you need to consider.

What is great about Thanksgiving is the concept. You get together with friends and family and eat well. There are no gifts to stress about and the food is not too much work as inevitably,  people bring a contribution to the feast. It ties in with nature in that the food reflects the bounties of the harvest (and perhaps in earlier times, the last feast you would have before the hardships of winter set in). At every Thanksgiving dinner we attended, there was a moment of serious reflection at the table in which everyone got a turn to say what they were thankful for.

Much better than whining because your in-laws are convinced you are a scarf person and just gave you your twentieth scarf for Christmas. Or wishing that Santa had found the wherewithal to put a Playstation 3 in your stocking.

Even though I no longer live in America, I still take the time to be thankful at this time of year. In Johannesburg it is easy. If you listen to 94.7 Highveld stereo in the mornings at this time of year, you’d better have your dark glasses and tissues on standby, because it’s Christmas Wish time.  I like to think of it more as Thanksgiving season. People show their thankfulness for family and friends and sometimes virtual strangers by nominating them. And all of us who listen, even if you are feeling the financial squeeze, realise that we need to be thankful for what we have and the blessings that come our way and fail to recognise. I get so caught up in being grateful, I barely shout at the radio when they say “amount” of wishes instead of  “number” of wishes. For that story click here.

Forget Christmas wish lists and make a Thanksgiving list!

I am thankful for: The boy with two brains, the challenging brilliant girl, the wise cracking family clown, the friends who send me virtual slaps when I whine and virtual hugs when I need them, (I miss laughing so hard around the Thanksgiving table that we all risk choking), the sister who “gets” me, the brother who challenges me creatively, the parents who are always there for us all.

I am thankful to live in a crazy city where the Christmas wish on the radio probably causes several near accidents a day as people blubber and sniff their way to work. Thanks for those tears, they remind me that I am lucky.

Let’s drug the world!

Give them roots and help them flourish

One of my facebook buddies just posted a Youtube video which was hilarious, but sad. Clearly this adult is not smarter than a 5th grader. It’s gratifying that the 5th grader actually got it right though!

I grew up with a mother who has a voracious appetite for reading and acquiring information. In the 70s she was national champion of the Venture quiz show and joint winner of a radio travel quiz. She starts a lot of conversations with “I wonder…”; “Did you know….”;  “I wonder what…”; .

I’m not moaning really because this intense interest in the world and the written word led us to be almost as curious as she is and to realise that to have just a fraction of the knowledge out there is to be rich. I was thrilled when my son decided that he really really couldn’t survive without a copy of “How to Avoid a Wombat’s Bum” Okay so it really helps that Mitchell Symons picks information and titles that really appeal to your average 12 year old.

This son, who has inherited his grandmother’s voracious appetite for acquiring knowledge, is not thriving at school. He fidgets and misses information, he is amazingly disorganised. His teacher asked me to have him assessed, because he was clearly bright, but as she put it “it looks like he is bursting with ideas and concepts, but he is getting so frustrated with himself because he is missing the point most of the time.”    She, thankfully, did not bring up that boring old acronym “ADD”.

We went to a highly recommended educational psychologist, for testing. It turns out that, in her opinion, the kid is not ADD, but is “the boy with two brains”. He is of superior IQ. But there is a catch! His left (logical, verbal, organised) side of the brain is above-average. His right (creative, non-verbal, conceptual) side of his brain is gifted. There is a 21 point disparity between the two. She described it as having two different people in your head speaking two different languages. It explains the disorganisation, the guitar lessons that ROCK and the continual need for nagging over the simplest tasks – he is in a completely different world!

A note to all simpering parents who say their children are “gifted” to excuse their bratty behaviour: You would run a mile if your child was really gifted…it’s no picnic! And any gifted child is quite capable of having good manners.

In addition, we have to visit a neurologist for an EEG to check that the physiological side of the brain is working normally (just in case…horror words for a parent). After 5 weeks of waiting for our appointment, it arrives, the day after International Teachers’ Day. The EEG clearly illustrates the differences in the two sides of the brain, but there are no reasons to worry physiologically. Phew we are off that hook, but not before the neurologist suggest that Ritalin could be prescribed to help the boy concentrate… This is the moment I lose all respect for the man.

Perhaps he is too used to parents who would gladly shove a whole pharmacy full of pills into their children to make them conform. Maybe he has shares in the company that makes the drug. Maybe he sees me as a cash cow – Ritalin users have to be evaluated every 6 months – at R1200 a pop, it’s a nice little earner. But I am not going to subject my son to a dumbing down pill and these possible  side effects, just because it seems like the easy answer.

We are planning Auditory Integration Training, swimming (to help the two sides of the brain coordinate physically), the ROCKING guitar lesson are great, and some study skills therapy to help him harness the creative side of the brain to get the boring old linear work expected from school out of his head and onto the page! Dietary options will be explored but drugs will not be taken.

Thank you to the teacher who does not insisted on drugged-to-the-eyeballs students. For Teachers Day, in addition to other gifts, we gave her the card pictured above. The tree represents the roots that a great foundation education provides and the leaves, the flourishing that an insightful teacher can provide. It’s cool – there is not a drop of ink on the card. The trunk is lazer engraved to show the inner part of the card stock, while the leaves are lazer cut-outs. Any colour paper can be slotted into the inside of the card, so the leaves can be any colour at all!

Talking about honouring teachers, how cute is this “we love you” mug we printed for a class of 2nd graders for their much loved teacher!

Are you free?

Do you agree?

Not are you in prison?  or  Have you been abducted and kept as a sex slave in a garden shed for umpteen years?

But…

Are you free?

Don’t you think that some are shackled by ideas that keep their minds in chains?

A school in Middle-of-Nowhere, USA has wasted about $700 on t-shirts for their marching band because they depicted the evolution of man as well as the evolution of music. This is one of those daft towns where the school district (yes! Educators who are supposed to be educating!) probably voted not to allow the Theory of Evolution to be taught (or mentioned, or probably even thought about). My favourite stupid quote from the article: “I was disappointed with the image on the shirt. I don’t think evolution should be associated with our school.”  Reading between the lines: Development of  scientifically based theories, advancement in knowledge and thinking outside the religious box are not allowed in Education!

Can we all scream now?

They don’t want to admit that the origin of mankind can be traced back by science… They deny the theories of Charles Darwin as they feel they clash with the concept of creation depicted in the Bible.

If we follow this argument logically then  South Africa must be one of the most anti-biblical countries in the world. And the World Heritage Sites in the Cradle of Humankind are some sort of pagan conspiracy.

One of my favourite quotations: “Only the educated are free” is attributed to Epictetus – A Greek-born Roman slave and Stoic philosopher… He had to know what he was talking about having experienced slavery and freedom.

If you are educated enough to know that sticking to a narrow mindset will get your brain locked away forever… go back to school and thank the teacher who turned the key that set you free… Mr Malema need not bother.

International Teachers’ Day – 5 October 2009

They brew the right ideas - give them the vessel to prove it!

Jeremy Mansfield mugs Whackhead and we mug him back

Those of you who listen to 94.7 Highveld Stereo will have heard Jeremy Mansfield throw a coffee mug at Whackhead Simpson‘s head on Thursday morning.

This excellent demonstration of a mugging technique was part of an on going battle between Jeremy and his team. They insist on torturing him with the sound of a dentists drill and he retaliates.

Hostilities started some months ago when Jeremy had a dental malfunction and was talking about having to go to the dentist. Paul continually played the drill sound, ignoring Jeremy’s pleas for a cease fire and eventually  Jeremy stormed out of the studio. As a result of this mini-drama, one of the listeners nominated “Dental Assistant” as the  job she wanted Jeremy to perform as part of the MNet “I wanna be” reality TV series.

On Thursday, this listener was in the studio as her nomination had won and a very unhappy Jeremy was interviewing her.  Paul threatened to play the drill sound effect again and Jeremy threatened to throw a coffee mug at him. Whackhead Simpson, safely on the sideline, was urging Paul to press the button…. Jeremy decided to switch the game around and told Paul that if he pushed the button, he would throw the mug at Whackhead.

Paul pushed the button.

Whackhead got mugged.

Jeremy broke a coffee mug.

We had an idea….

We designed it, made it and sent it to Jeremy Mansfield…. and asked him if he wanted to have the sales of these Mugger Mugs go to charity… watch this space.

It’s a dog’s life

puppy pals

Having recently seen Marley and Me and having forgotten to take a wad of kleenex into the movie with me,  I ended up with seriously puffy eyes and a renewed appreciation for our canine friends. One of the lines in the movie struck such a chord, and although I cannot recite it verbatum, the idea has been stuck to my soul ever since. The concept that the love of a dog is perhaps one of the most amazingly self less relationships on the planet. They just want to be appreciated (and fed) and give a whole lot of slobbering devotion back.

Why then do hideous humans use these animals to make a quick buck? A recent TV expose of puppy mills showed the world how depraved these individuals are. Female dogs are kept in unbelievably squalid conditions and are required to produce litter after litter to feed the demand for “cute” puppies in pet stores. You pay hundreds, sometimes thousands for these bundles of “pedigree” fluff and later discover that your purebred is a “pavement special”. Not that Pavement Specials are not special, but the fraudulent claims of pedigree are wrong and puppy mills are stomach churningly gruesome.

The Wet Nose Animal Rescue Centre has rescued many dogs and puppies from the most inhumane conditions. They are in the process of legally challenging the creatures that perpetrate these disgusting practices, but in the meantime they have to keep going, feeding all the animals they have rescued and finding loving homes for them. Supporting the organisation should not be too much of a trial.

If you want to read about the visit to the puppy mill go to the wetnose site and read their news article on the visit: http://www.wetnose.org.za/news.php?action=view&pk=24. I was overwhelmed with a desire to force this barbaric cretin to live like his dogs for a month or more. This is a man who does not appreciate the value of a wet nose, big puppy eyes and an wagging tail.

Put your money where your heart is and buy a wetnose t-shirt, coffeemug or laptop skin from Howling mad. A portion of every sale goes to Wet Nose, and they get publicity every time you wear it, drink from it at the office, or take your laptop out and about!

While we might be HOWLING MAD – we like to howl in the right direction…especially when puppy farmers make us mad!  So howl for all the dogs caught in the snares of unscrupulous breeders and support Wet Nose!

The tough side of dog abuse